Online:Discarded Dream Journal

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Book Information Discarded Dream Journal
ID	8516
Collection	Solstice Summations

Discarded Dream Journal

A Tide-Born's records of dreams

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It seems the only place I can find peace from prying eyes is when I am tending to the shoals, but if the fear of work doesn't scare you away, Euhei and Xaxotl, know that I have cursed these pages and soon the tide will swell and wash you away.

* * *
I dreamed last night of bugs ground in a mortar and pestle, but they were so unlike the bugs of Solstice. They were shades of brown and green and were crushed into the consistency of mud and moss. Strangest of all was how my mouth watered at the sight of them. I awoke with such an aching hunger that I raided my egg-kin's stash of snails and blamed their theft on a wandering pangrit.

I feel some guilt, of course, but I spent the morning gathering urchins to make up for it. After all, Tsinee prefers the taste of urchins, so really it is a kindness.

* * *
I am writing this in the middle of the night. My room is cool from a chill breeze coming off the early morning tide, but I can feel so clearly a thick, languid humidity clinging to my scales. I don't remember much of this dream, no mouth-watering bugs, but if I close my eyes and dip my claws into the shimmering pool of sleep, I can feel the warmth of another place. How the hot air clings to me and leaves my scales feeling oily and slick. It is not unlike Solstice in hotter months, but there is a smell I cannot place. Of decay, but not rot. Not sickly sweet, but earthy.

* * *

I spoke to Tide-Reader Suhath about my dreams. He coaxed it out of me like a fish from beneath coral. It is my own fault, I was inattentive during my lessons. I may as well have flared my spines and sang of my dreams out loud.

It was nice though, speaking with him. He said I was not alone. That others have told him of dreams of far away places, unfamiliar sights and sounds. How I blushed when he said this, embarrassed to have thought for even a moment that I was special. He pretended not to notice.

He says they are a gift from the Void. A glimpse of the paths we once walked before being delivered anew by the Tide. That I should enjoy them, but no more than I would enjoy a sweet treat or a beautiful sunset. That they are not something to indulge in.

After all, I should be focused on the path I now walk, not the one I left behind.

* * *
I spent the day trying to prepare myself for another unfamiliar dream. I gathered driftwood and mud in a bowl beneath my bed. Even begged Luzeeso for one of his many caged beetles, the ones that chirp, so that I can listen to it as I drifted off to sleep. But, now that I am laying here, I cannot help but think of Suhath's words.

All this effort and what have I accomplished? I chase scales I was never meant to wear. Suhath was kind to call these dreams a gift, but truthfully, I think they are a test. I could sit here, foam-drunk on these memories, or I could pursue my destined scales.

I decided no sleep for me tonight, not while my room smells so strongly of mud, but I will speak with Luzeeso's little beetle.

I will tell him of all the wonders I have seen in this life. How Tsinee is the best egg-kin I could ask for and has never failed to be there when I am frightened or sad. How I admire Luzeeso's curiosity and his skill in catching such handsome little bugs. Or, how even Euhei and Xaxotl have made my life richer by being in it, even when all I want is for them to stop picking on me and instead let me join in on their fun.

Yes, this is the path I wish to pursue. And one day, Tide's willing, I will walk these shores in my destined scales, accompanied by all my dear friends.